Dear Annie: My wife’s lack of interest in intimacy has left me desperate for physical attention

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Annie: Keep trying -- in couples therapy and in individual therapy, for both of you. It might take years, and it might take trying more therapists, but you deserve to receive love and affection in your marriage.

What do you do when your spouse isn't interested in any sort of physical intimacy? Annie Lane tackles that topic and more in today's Dear Annie advice column.I have been married now for almost 23 years. Soon after the wedding, I found that my wife had virtually no interest in intimacy of any kind. Three therapists and many months later, the situation is the same. She does have admirable attributes, and I have made an effort to love her for those.

I don’t believe that he has actually cheated on me with anyone, but he’s lied about people being at my house, my female cousin included, and even let people steal my stuff. How do I approach him and say we can work this out, but just please be honest? When will it just be like it was again? What should I do? I love him, but he won’t go to marriage counseling. Instead, he says I need to go to the library and find a book on how to be a wife.

Propose couples therapy once more and see what it might take for him to attend. At this point, your marriage is at a standstill, and without his cooperation and effort to get things back on track, they never will. Don’t lose sight of what you deserve.

 

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